How should parents, teachers, and youth leaders respond to this question?

Bristol Palin, the 18-year old daughter of Gov. Sarah Palin, was recently interviewed on TV about her teen pregnancy and birth of her baby boy on December 27, 2008.  After talking about how “awesome” it was to be a mom and how “very, very, very cute” her baby was, she proceeded to share how tough it is being a teenage mom and how she wished all this could have happened ten years later.

When asked if she had philosophical or religious opposition to contraceptives, the teenager mustered up the following response:  “No. I don’t want to get into detail about that. But I think abstinence is, like—like, the—I don’t know how to put it—like, the main—everyone should be abstinent or whatever, but it’s not realistic at all.”

I see a very confused teenager trying to make the best out of her current situation while making herself feel better about it.  Her bungled response is indicative to what groups like Planned Parenthood are trying to convince moms and dads of teenagers today.  That is we should teach abstinence, but since it’s unrealistic to believe teens will practice it (they’re going to “do it” anyway) we need to make sure they have their condoms.

Bristol is trying to have it both ways.  On the one hand she regrets getting pregnant and wants to tell kids not to have sex (abstinence) because of all the consequences, etc.  Then on the other hand, she says that abstinence is “unrealistic,” so be sure to use a condom.  Besides, being a teenage mom is “exciting” she proclaims while complaining about all her sleepless nights and no time for herself.

The problem is if she takes a strong stand for abstinence then she feels like she has to admit to herself and others that what she did was wrong.  Call it pride or whatever, she therefore rationalizes (covers up) the mistake she made by saying all is well and abstinence is “unrealistic” anyway.

To say abstinence is “unrealistic” is to admit that we humans are nothing more than animals unable to control our urges and feelings and therefore must act upon them (if it feels good, do it) anytime we please regardless of the consequences.  Of course, this is not true.  So it is vital that parents, teachers, and youth leaders help teenagers understand that they are not “sexual beings” as the culture would lead them to believe, they are human beings.

They have a brain and the ability to think about consequences before they act, so that if they’re not ready to take on certain consequences, they can make intelligent decisions in advance to be free of them.  They have a heart that needs to be taught the difference between love and infatuation.  They have a soul forever seeking to know the difference between right and wrong.  And they have a responsibility to deal with the social consequences involved in raising children.

In a sex-saturated culture, we need to constantly reinforce to our kids sexual abstinence until marriage as the standard in which to follow.  Any teen embracing this lifestyle will never have to worry about walking in Bristol’s shoes – being a mom [or dad] when they’re not ready.  They’ll never have to worry about devastating sexually transmitted diseases in their lives (many of which there is no cure).  They’ll never have to worry about their hearts being broken when someone gets what they’re after and they get dumped.

Then they will have so many wonderful things to look forward to when they are ready to make a lifelong commitment to someone based on love in marriage: husband-wife, mom-dad, children-family.  Sounds pretty “realistic” to me as it has and still is for millions of teens nationwide!

Until next time…

M.L. Productions, Inc.